Worse Things Happen in Countries with Lines Under Them
Everything's all right now. The Prime Minister has descended from the right hand of George W Bush and now stands ready to comfort us all in our pain. The terrorist attacks were "barbaric", he said; and all the more barbaric for being so impolite as to occur while he and seven other real people were thrashing out new ways to get Africans to pay western companies for African resources. If only the perpetrators had waited until the end of the G8 summit, if only they had not interrupted him, they might have aspired to the level of civilisation manifest in Chirac of Haiti, Putin of Chechnya, Bush of Falluja or even Tony himself.
Tony expressed his "profound condolences" and his "sympathy and sorrow" to the dead, the injured, the bereaved and so forth. This was jolly comforting for all concerned, I'm sure.
"I think we all know what [the terrorists] are trying to do," he continued, with that finger-wagging intonation which suits him so well, redolent of the pulpit at morning assembly in a more than averagely unpleasant Church of England school. The terrorists were trying "to frighten us out of doing the things we want to do", trying to "stop us going about our business", he said. But he assured us that we would not allow the terrorists to do this. Business will never be stopped from going about doing the things it wants to do; not on Tony's watch. Doubtless this was even more comforting. He mentioned "spirit and dignity and ... a quiet and true strength", which apparently is Made in Britain. It's a shame he doesn't use it himself now and then instead of the customary gambollings round Bush's golf shoes.
"This is a very sad day for the British people," he concluded; "but we will hold true to the British way of life", minus Magna Carta and one or two other superficials, one presumes. If depriving the British people of a few civil liberties has made us as safe as we are today, how else can New Labour move forward not back if not by depriving us of more? Better safe than sorry, I mean to say.
The Prime Minister did not mention - perhaps our infamous intelligence services have neglected to tell him - whether or not this was the kind of terrorist attack which we invaded Iraq to prevent. Perhaps Jeremy Paxman will ask him one day. One obvious answer does spring to mind, namely that we went into Iraq to protect ourselves from fictitious bombs, not real ones; but somehow I doubt that's the answer the Prime Minister would give.
Tony expressed his "profound condolences" and his "sympathy and sorrow" to the dead, the injured, the bereaved and so forth. This was jolly comforting for all concerned, I'm sure.
"I think we all know what [the terrorists] are trying to do," he continued, with that finger-wagging intonation which suits him so well, redolent of the pulpit at morning assembly in a more than averagely unpleasant Church of England school. The terrorists were trying "to frighten us out of doing the things we want to do", trying to "stop us going about our business", he said. But he assured us that we would not allow the terrorists to do this. Business will never be stopped from going about doing the things it wants to do; not on Tony's watch. Doubtless this was even more comforting. He mentioned "spirit and dignity and ... a quiet and true strength", which apparently is Made in Britain. It's a shame he doesn't use it himself now and then instead of the customary gambollings round Bush's golf shoes.
"This is a very sad day for the British people," he concluded; "but we will hold true to the British way of life", minus Magna Carta and one or two other superficials, one presumes. If depriving the British people of a few civil liberties has made us as safe as we are today, how else can New Labour move forward not back if not by depriving us of more? Better safe than sorry, I mean to say.
The Prime Minister did not mention - perhaps our infamous intelligence services have neglected to tell him - whether or not this was the kind of terrorist attack which we invaded Iraq to prevent. Perhaps Jeremy Paxman will ask him one day. One obvious answer does spring to mind, namely that we went into Iraq to protect ourselves from fictitious bombs, not real ones; but somehow I doubt that's the answer the Prime Minister would give.
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