The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Land Mines: This Evil Must Stop

The Righteous Army has investigated the Beit Lahia beach shelling and, as might be expected, found that Hamas is to blame. Six righteous shells were fired onto and around the beach, five of them landing righteously along a 250-metre stretch and one righteously unaccounted for. Purely by coincidence, a land mine, which Hamas had planted under the beach in case of a righteous Israeli landing, was triggered at approximately the same time, inflicting wounds which a Human Rights Watch investigator and former Pentagon official says are "primarily to the head and torso" - just as one would expect from an explosion underneath the body. In a malicious attempt to smear the Righteous Artillery, Palestinian doctors callously removed shrapnel from some of the wounded before they were taken to Israel for treatment. This would disguise the source of the wounds, since shrapnel from a Hamas mine would of course leave negligible scarring when removed from a potential terrorist and/or instrument of emotive anti-semitic propaganda. Meanwhile, an air strike on the Gaza strip has pre-empted a rocket attack by two militants. It is not clear how the militants and their rockets were detected; we must hope the Righteous Military used more reliable methods than they used when searching for that shell of theirs. Seven civilians were also killed and thirty-two injured, but it is apparently too early to tell whether Hamas had mined this area also.

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