needs a few directions
To find his way on Freedom's map.
If he could vote in some elections,
He would be such a jolly chap.
The beastly Burqa
hides the features
Which weep beneath Muhammad's yoke;
These women are enslaved, poor creatures,
Like all too many brownish folk.
A new Crusade
of brave and free men
Must drag them forth from moral night.
They'll thank us when at last they see, men,
That they were wrong and we are right.
, upright yet humble,
Marching as one, shall never fall;
Yet if our valiant tread should stumble,
The terrorists will conquer all.
To be Embedded
with the squaddies!
To show the war in brutal fact!
To ask about civilian bodies
Would show a dreadful want of tact.
A hood, or here and there a Fetter
Can sometimes cause a bit of fuss,
Although we have done so much better
Than those we hood, had they been us.
Alas, our Goodness
By those who are in Badness wrought;
And yet, when someone's detrimented,
'Tis said that we have fallen short.
must not be doubted,
And would be foolish to deny.
When we are crossed we gas about it,
Our actions to excuse thereby.
with firm decision
And surgify the battlefield;
With awesome shock and dead precision,
Let freedom's sword slice human shield.
A thirst for Justice
is our motive;
Free, fair elections are our game.
If natives now do not feel votive,
It's hardly we who are to blame.
is an ugly matter
Where agonies of horror lurk.
How fine to stay at home, and chatter,
While others do the dirty work.
teach us truly
That human rights, so grimly won,
Must be bestowed on the unruly
From out the muzzle of a gun.
with its awful beauty
Gives healthy distance to our war,
Enabling us to do our duty
While watching safely from afar.
The use of Nukes
is wrong and evil:
The sum of all rogue statesmen's hopes.
'Tis better far to spare upheaval
And use depleted isotopes.
? Oh, that! Well, by tarnation,
'Twas nought to us. And yet, methinks,
'Twould serve our cause, our God and nation
To keep it from the heathen Chinks.
occurred some hitting,
Some nasty bullying, and more.
Some bullies were locked up - omitting
The ones who sent them off to war.
of the Palestinians
Is not undifficult, no doubt;
The more so, as it is our minions
Who've gone and kicked the beggars out.
'gainst the old dictator
We firmly slapped down as they rose;
They may enjoy their freedom later,
When we can regulate the dose.
From out the Sands
come buried treasures:
Shell casings turned to evil ends,
And bodies too, which fell to measures
Too harsh save when employed by friends.
are cheaply fed and watered,
Cheaply equipped, and cheaply armed,
Cheaply protected, cheaply quartered,
And treated cheaply when they're harmed.
For things eternal, Universal
Our brave boys fight in foreign parts;
And yet a fairly small reversal
Can lose so many minds and hearts.
British, firm and trendy,
By light of reason we bestow;
But keep them adequately bendy
To stand a million deaths or so.
We've bombed another Wedding
Which must be counted a defeat:
The press release will not be hearty;
The act was surely indiscreet.
pray do not lump us;
They are not right, nor good, nor true.
Although this war's a nasty rumpus,
We have belief in what we do.
The birthright of each British fellow:
A golden thread that others lack.
A slightly duller streak of Yellow
Runs down our glorious leader's back.
For all our Zeal
we take a beating.
They are not worthy; what a bore.
But even as we are retreating,
We try to help a little more.Boggust Quabarle